What Her Drink Says About Her

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Seven New York City bartenders were asked if they could nail a woman’s personality based on what she drinks. Though interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts. The results:

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Drink: Beer
Personality: Casual, low-maintenance; down to earth.
Your Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool.

Drink: Blender Drinks
Personality: Flaky, annoying; a pain in the ass.
Your Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy.

Drink: Mixed Drinks
Personality: Older, has picky taste; knows what she wants.
Your Approach: You won’t have to approach her. She’ll send YOU a drink.

Drink: Wine (does not include white zinfandel, see below)
Personality: Conservative and classy, sophisticated.
Your Approach: Tell her you wish Reagan had had four more years… Alzheimer’s and term limits be damned.

Drink: White Zin
Personality: Easy; thinks she is classy and sophisticated, actually has no clue.
Your Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is…

Drink: Shots
Personality: Hanging with frat-boy pals or looking to get drunk… and naked.
Your Approach: Easiest hit in the joint. Nothing to do but wait.

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Violins

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It’s because of all the violins.

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Posted: April 20, 2026 (2 months ago)
Views: 0
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Topics: aging, gender, nightlife
Sensitivity: Questionable