A wealthy widow is looking for a husband

A wealthy, lonely widow decided she needed a new man in her life, so she placed an ad in the newspaper:

“Wealthy widow seeks a man to share her fortune and life. Applicants must meet the following qualifications:

1. Don’t be aggressive toward me.
2. Never run away.
3. Must be extremely good in bed.”

For months, she got plenty of calls and house visits, but no one met her criteria.

One day, the doorbell rang.

She opened the door and saw a man lying there without arms and without legs.

Confused, she asked, “Who are you? What do you want?”

“Hello,” he said. “Your search is over. I’m the man of your dreams. I have no arms, so I can’t hit you, and no legs, so I can’t run away.”

“Okay… well, do you think you’re good in bed?” she asked.

He replied, “Well, how do you think I rang the doorbell?”

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Suffering depression in today’s culture can be rougher than

Suffering depression in today’s culture can be rougher than ever. Some days I feel about as small as Lady GaGa’s penis.

Posted: February 20, 2026 (7 months ago)
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Topics: relationships
Sensitivity: PG-13