Dead Chicken, Nearly Lost Mommy

Young David came home from school one day and found his pet chicken laying on the ground with his legs pointing straight up into the sky. When his father got home, he explained that the chicken has died and his legs were pointed up to Jesus in heaven. They buried the chicken and that was that.

Two weeks later his dad came home from work and David ran up to him yelling, “Daddy, Daddy, we nearly lost Mommy today.”

“What?” his father replied.

“When I got home from school, Mommy was laying on the bed with her legs pointing up in the air yelling, ‘Jesus, I’m coming, Jesus I’m coming.’ If it wasn’t for Uncle Terry holding her down we would have lost her for sure!”

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I like to do it doggy-style. That’s where I growl at my husband,

I like to do it doggy-style. That’s where I growl at my husband, then lift my leg and pee on him.

Posted: April 22, 2026 (5 months ago)
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Topics: children, communication, family
Sensitivity: PG-13