Drunk Guy’s Mystery Discovery at the Lab

A guy went out one night and got pretty wasted at a local bar. He woke up with a terrible hangover and went to take a piss and some Alka-Seltzer when he looked down and saw that he had a red and a brown crusty substance around his dick.

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He scraped off a little of each into a container and sent it to a lab for identification. When he went to see the lab technician, the tech said he had some good news and some bad… first of all, the red substance was ordinary lipstick but I’m afraid the brown substance was…. chewing tobacco!

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