Two Dogs at the Vet

Two dogs are sitting in the waiting room of the veterinary office, reading their doggie magazines.

The first dog turns to the second. “So what are you here for?” the first dog asks.

“Well, you know how it is, being alone all day in a house?”

“I suppose so…”

“Let me tell you. When my owner comes home, I’m so excited to see her that I start humping the coffee table. She pulls me off, so I start humping the couch. She pulls me off, so I start humping my chew toy. So she brought me here to have me fixed.”

“Oh, I see…”

They go back to reading their doggie magazines.

After a while, the second dog turns to the first. “So what are you here for?”

“When my owner comes home, I’m so excited to see her that I start humping the coffee table. She pulls me off, so I start humping the couch. She pulls me off, I’m so excited that I start humping HER.”

“So, you’re here to get fixed too?”

“Nah, I’m here to get my nails clipped.”

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Vanished Without a Tres

I recently attended a magic show in Mexico…

The magician said, “Uno, dos,” and then vanished without a tres.

Posted: September 8, 2026 (2 weeks ago)
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Topics: animals, dog behavior, pets
Sensitivity: Questionable