The Mugger and the Congressman

Written by

in

Late one night a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs.

“Give me your money,” he demanded.

Indignant, the man replied, “You can’t do this – I’m a Republican congressman!”

“In that case,” replied the robber, “Give me MY money!”

Add to the Chaos. Got a better punchline, worse take, or public cry for help? Drop a one-liner. Approved replies show up here after moderation.

No public regrets yet
Nobody has heckled this yet. Suspicious restraint.

Optional. Bad aliases encouraged.

0/280 characters. Moderated before public embarrassment.
Related chaos

More chaos like this

Related punchlines from nearby corners of the joke swamp.

Joke The Squire of the High Pot and Noose Joke Don’t Your Ears Ever Get Cold Joke Let’s Pretend We’re Married Joke The Perfect Woman Joke The Irishman and the Ten Pint Bet Joke Only 40,000 Miles Now

Get 5 Unhinged Jokes Every Friday

No spam. Just dark humor and bad decisions in email form.

Share:TwitterFacebookLinkedinRedditWhatsappEmail

More posts

the blank in the adage, “Absence makes the _____ grow _____.”

the blank in the adage, “Absence makes the _____ grow _____.” Turned out that my reply “penis” and “harder” was not the correct one.

Get 5 Unhinged Jokes Every Friday

No spam. Just dark humor and bad decisions in email form.

Posted: May 18, 2026 (1 month ago)
Views: 0
Shares: 0
Topics: politics, social commentary, time
Sensitivity: PG-13