’Cause You’re Ugly

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected a quart of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a two-pound can of coffee, and a one-pound package of bacon.

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.

He said, “You must be single.”

The woman, a bit startled but intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, looked at her six items on the belt.

Seeing nothing particularly unusual about her selections, she said, “Well, you know what, you’re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?”

The drunk replied, “’Cause you’re ugly.”

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I don’t know if “Topless Webcamming” can be considered a skill,

I don’t know if “Topless Webcamming” can be considered a skill, but what the fuck, it’s going on the resume.

Posted: April 20, 2026 (5 months ago)
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Topics: daily life, nightlife, relationships
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