I’m Going Home to Screw the Cat

Three mice were sitting in a bar talking about how tough they were. The first mouse slams a shot and says, “I play with mouse traps for fun. I’ll run into one on purpose and as it is closing on me, I grab the bar and bench press it twenty or thirty times.” And with that he slams another shot.

The second mouse slams a shot and says, “That’s nothing. I take those D-Con tablets, cut them up and snort them just for the fun of it.” And with that he slams another shot.

The third mouse slams a shot, gets up and walks away.

The first two mice look at each other, and then turn to the third mouse and ask, “Where the heck are you going?”

The third mouse stops and replies, “I’m going home to screw the cat.”