One More Time

Written by

in

A doctor tells his patient, “I have terrible news. You have a rare incurable condition and will be dead by morning.”

The man goes home and tells his wife — it’s tragic, but there’s nothing to be done.

They go to bed… he’s reflecting on his life… and looks at his wife, and thinks… one more time. He wakes her up… and they make love.

She goes back to sleep, but he can’t sleep… and he looks at her again… and thinks… I gotta have it. He wakes her up, and they have sex.

She goes back to sleep again. The hours pass. The sun will soon be up. He thinks, better to die happy… and he nudges his wife again… “How about it?”

She looks at him angrily and says, “LOOK. I have to get up in the morning… YOU don’t!”

Add to the Chaos. Got a better punchline, worse take, or public cry for help? Drop a one-liner. Approved replies show up here after moderation.

No public regrets yet
Nobody has heckled this yet. Suspicious restraint.

Optional. Bad aliases encouraged.

0/280 characters. Moderated before public embarrassment.

Get 5 Unhinged Jokes Every Friday

No spam. Just dark humor and bad decisions in email form.

Neckwear for an Octopus

When choosing neckwear for an octopus, a bow tie is the way to go. A long tie is just likely to get tangled in the tentacles. Plus, most octopi believe that a bow tie makes them look like eccentric intellectuals rather than slimy cephalopods.

Get 5 Unhinged Jokes Every Friday

No spam. Just dark humor and bad decisions in email form.

Posted: May 4, 2026 (2 months ago)
Views: 0
Shares: 0
Topics: death, marital humor, sex
Sensitivity: PG-13