The Mercedes Sight

An old guy from the countryside visits New York for the first time. He’s never seen so many cars, and he’s never been in one.

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He gets into a cab and starts asking the driver questions.

“What’s that wheel for?”

“That’s the steering wheel,” the driver says. “It lets me change direction.” He gives a quick demonstration, turning down a side street.

“What about that button?”

“That’s the horn. I use it to warn people.” He honks twice.

“And what’s that?” the old man asks, pointing at the Mercedes emblem on the hood.

“That’s a sight,” says the driver, deciding to have some fun. “It helps me aim at the people I want to run over.”

With that, he lines up a pedestrian crossing the street, speeds up, then swerves at the last second.

Suddenly… Bang! A loud crash comes from the side of the car.

“Well,” says the old man, “you’ve got all these fancy gadgets, but you would’ve missed him if I hadn’t opened the door.”

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Fresh Dig Marks

Whenever I hear of a person missing from my neighborhood, I start digging holes in my yard. Nothing freaks out the cops more than fresh dig marks.

Posted: May 4, 2026 (5 months ago)
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Topics: rural humor, travel, urban legend
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