Show Him Your Badge and Warrant

A DEA officer had a tip that a farmer was growing weed and showed up to inform the farmer that he would be searching the farm for illegal marijuana plants.

The farmer said: “I do not consent to a search without a warrant.”

At which point the DEA pulled out his badge and a signed warrant and said: “THIS gives me the authoritah to search wherever I want.”

So the farmer said: “Okay, but stay out of that field,” pointing to a fenced-in field.

The DEA says: “Then that is where I will start.”

The farmer just shrugged and went back to work.

A few minutes later the DEA agent was screaming and the farmer came to see the DEA agent running and diving, trying to avoid being gored by the farmer’s large bull. The DEA agent was yelling for help. The farmer shouted: “SHOW HIM YOUR BADGE AND WARRANT!!!”

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One day a neighbor kid named Billy and I spent a whole afternoon and well into the night

One day a neighbor kid named Billy and I spent a whole afternoon and well into the night digging a hole in the back yard with a spoon and a little plastic beach pail. We were going to find buried treasure or dig all the way to China — who knows? The important thing was that it took our minds off of what a great time our more popular classmates were probably having that night at the senior prom.

Posted: April 28, 2026 (5 months ago)
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Topics: animals, law & crime, rural humor
Sensitivity: Clean