The Bank Robbery and the Triplets

So a lady walks into a bank, and right when she gets into the bank it gets held up, and she gets shot three times in the stomach, and she’s pregnant, so that’s no good.

She’s rushed to the hospital and they fix her up. As she leaves she asks the doctor about her baby. The doctor says, “Oh! You’re going to have triplets. Don’t worry, they’ll be just fine, but each one has a bullet lodged in its stomach. Don’t worry though, the bullets will pass through their system through normal metabolism.”

As time goes on the woman has three children, two girls and a boy.

Twelve years later, one of the girls comes up to her mother and says, “Mommy, a very weird thing just happened to me. I was going to the bathroom and a bullet dropped into the toilet.” The woman comforts her and tells her what happened at the bank.

A couple weeks later, the other daughter comes up and goes, “Mom, I was in the bathroom and I heard a ping and there was a bullet there.”

The mother goes, “Honey, don’t worry,” and tells her about the bank.

A month later the son comes in and says, “Mommy, I’ve done a very bad thing!”

“You passed a bullet into the toilet, didn’t you?”

“No, I was jerking off and I shot the dog.”

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Last One There Gets a Rotten Egg

Q: What did one sperm cell say to the other sperm cell?

A: Last one there gets a rotten egg!

Posted: June 2, 2026 (4 months ago)
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Topics: bodily functions, crude humor, everyday mishap
Sensitivity: Uncensored