Topic: food

  • Polish Sausage

    I walked up to the counter and said, “Yeah, I’ll take a Polish sausage.”

    The guy behind the counter squints at me and asks, “Are you Polish?”

    I’m immediately offended.

    “What kind of question is that? If I ordered a bratwurst, would you assume I’m German? If I asked for a Belgian waffle, would that make me Belgian? Dumplings — Chinese? What exactly made you think I was Polish?”

    He leans in, lowers his voice, and says,

    “Sir… this is a hardware store.”

  • Valentines Day

    Do men get anything out of valentines day? It depends on whether or not his wife will do the brussel sprout.

    What’s the brussel sprout?

    It’s when you put something in your mouth and pretend you like it