Celebrating That Long

My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.

I asked her, “Do you know him?”

“Yes,” she sighed. “He’s my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn’t been sober since.”

“My God!” I said. “Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?”

Add to the Chaos. Got a better punchline, worse take, or public cry for help? Drop a one-liner. Approved replies show up here after moderation.

No public regrets yet
Nobody has heckled this yet. Suspicious restraint.

Optional. Bad aliases encouraged.

0/280 characters. Moderated before public embarrassment.

Get 5 Unhinged Jokes Every Friday

No spam. Just dark humor and bad decisions in email form.

Did you know that there are 47 distinct ways to masturbate?

Did you know that there are 47 distinct ways to masturbate? Thanks, Wankepedia!

Get 5 Unhinged Jokes Every Friday

No spam. Just dark humor and bad decisions in email form.

Posted: April 18, 2026 (4 months ago)
Views: 0
Shares: 0
Topics: drugs & alcohol, relationships
Sensitivity: PG-13