Do You Have a Weedeater

Two Tennessee rednecks decided they weren’t going anywhere in life and thought they should go to college to get ahead.

Bubba turns to Billy Ray and says, “Tomorrow I think I’ll go to the Community College, and sign up for some classes.”

Billy Ray really doesn’t think very much, but says that he’ll go along for the ride.

The next day, Bubba and Billy Ray go down to the Community College, and Bubba meets the Admissions Counselor. After a short discussion, the Counselor signs Bubba up for the four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic.

“Logic?” Bubba says. “What the heck is that?”

Well, the Counselor says, “I’ll show you. Do you own a weedeater?”

“Yeah, I sure do,” says Bubba.

“Then I can assume, using logic, that because you own a weedeater, you must have a yard,” replied the Counselor.

“Hey, that’s really good!” replied Bubba.

The Counselor continued, “Logic will also tell me that since you have a yard, you also probably own a house.”

Impressed, the redneck said, “That’s amazing, yes, I do have a house!”

“And because you have a house, and a yard, you might also logically have a family,” said the Counselor.

“Hey, this is some good stuff! Yes, I do have a family!” says Bubba.

The Counselor said, “I’m not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife.”

“Yes, I sure do have a wife, her name is Betty Sue,” said Bubba.

The redneck was starting to catch on.

“Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can assume that you are probably heterosexual,” said the Counselor.

“You’re absolutely right! Why that’s the most fascinatin’ thing I ever heard, figuring all that out ’cause I own a weedeater! I can’t wait to take this logic class!” said Bubba.

The redneck, so proud of the new world opening up to him, walked back into the hallway where Billy Ray was waiting.

“So what classes are ya takin’?” asked Billy Ray.

“Math, English, History, and Logic!” replied Bubba.

“Logic?” Billy Ray says. “What’s that?”

Bubba says, “I’ll show you. Do you have a weedeater?”

“No.”

Perplexed, Bubba ponders for a moment, then says, “Then you’re homosexual, ain’t ya.”