A guy walks into a bar with a black eye. They ask what happened. He says, “Well, I was in church and we all stood up to sing. There was a big woman in front of me and I couldn’t help but notice that her dress didn’t fall properly, as some of it was bunched up in her butt area. I tried to look away, but I just couldn’t, so I reached forward, gave the dress a little tug, and it improved. But she immediately turned around and punched me in the eye!”
The next week the guy comes in and his eye has mostly healed, but the other one is bruised. They ask what happened and he says,
“Well, I was on the subway, and the same lady, wearing the same dress, was standing in front of me…”
“You didn’t learn your lesson from the last time?” they ask.
He says, “No, check it out: the guy next to me was also looking at her butt, and sure enough, I saw him reach forward and tug on the dress, and it was no longer bunched into her butt…”
“But I knew she didn’t like that, so with my pointing finger, I quickly pushed it back in. I guess she didn’t like that either, because she punched me.”
Heckle this joke
Got a better punchline or a worse take? Drop a one-liner.
