The Potato in the Speedo

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A guy is having trouble getting women’s attention at the beach. He tells the lifeguard:

“I’ve walked past every woman on this beach and none of them so much as glance my way. I’m even wearing my best Speedo to show off all the work I’ve put in at the gym. I don’t know what else to do.”

The lifeguard says, “Oh, that’s easy! Just put a potato in your Speedo and you’ll have all their eyes glued on you. Trust me.”

So the next day he does just that, and then goes to see the lifeguard:

“Hey man, so I did get a lot of looks, but not quite what I was expecting. They all looked completely disgusted and appalled, and not turned on at all.”

So the lifeguard looks down at his waist area:

“Okay, well, I guess I should have specified — you have to put the potato in the front of your Speedo.”

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There’s a girl in my office who pipes up at the end of every

There’s a girl in my office who pipes up at the end of every sentence and tries to finish it for you. In response, I’ve started ending all my sentences with “that fucks a donkey.” It hasn’t really stopped her from trying to finish my sentences, but it’s gotten me a LOT of attention from the Human Resources folks.

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Posted: April 16, 2026 (2 months ago)
Views: 0
Shares: 0
Topics: death, health, relationships
Sensitivity: PG-13