Didnt Expect ME Did Ya

Written by

in

Little Johnnie was late for class, and when he saw that the door was already closed, he opened it and went into the classroom tentatively. He very quietly shut the door and tiptoed to his seat hoping not to get the teacher after him.

This upset the teacher, who said to him, “Johnnie, is this how your father would have come in — late and sneaking to his seat? Go out and try it again, and get it right this time!”

So, Little Johnnie left the room and shut the door behind him quietly, as he’d come in. Then a moment later, he flung open the door with a clatter and stomped back into the room with a lit cigarette dangling from his lips. He slammed the door behind him, put his cigarette out on the carpet with his foot and said, “So Honey, didn’t expect ME, did ya?”

Add to the Chaos. Got a better punchline, worse take, or public cry for help? Drop a one-liner. Approved replies show up here after moderation.

No public regrets yet
Nobody has heckled this yet. Suspicious restraint.

Optional. Bad aliases encouraged.

0/280 characters. Moderated before public embarrassment.

Get 5 Unhinged Jokes Every Friday

No spam. Just dark humor and bad decisions in email form.

“Hey Mother, want another?” Some dude trying to get rid of a

“Hey Mother, want another?” Some dude trying to get rid of a broken condom.

Get 5 Unhinged Jokes Every Friday

No spam. Just dark humor and bad decisions in email form.

Posted: April 27, 2026 (2 months ago)
Views: 0
Shares: 0
Topics: children, education, parenting
Sensitivity: PG-13