Knitting While Speeding: A Hair-Raising Chase!

A patrol car is sitting on the side of the highway when a car speeds past at an alarming rate.

The patrol car takes off in pursuit, comes up beside the car, and looks across at the blonde driving. He notices she is knitting.

The cop turns on his lights and siren, and the blonde continues to knit, oblivious to her surroundings.

The cop winds down his window and uses a bullhorn to get the blonde’s attention, yelling, “Pull over!”

The blonde looks across at the cop, takes a second to answer, and finally says, “No! It’s a scarf!”

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Being a Literalist

Being a literalist can sometimes be very helpful.

I can always respond to “Do these jeans make my ass look fat?” with a confident and honest “No.”

But I dread the day when she rephrases it as “Does my ass look fat in these jeans?”

Posted: March 16, 2026 (6 months ago)
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Topics: daily life, transportation
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