There’s a girl in my office who pipes up at the end of every sentence and tries to finish it for you. In response, I’ve started ending all my sentences with “that fucks a donkey.” It hasn’t really stopped her from trying to finish my sentences, but it’s gotten me a LOT of attention from the Human Resources folks.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Which came first: underwear or the skidmark
Which came first: underwear or the skidmark?
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I cried because I didn’t have Jilly G’s tits. Then I met a man
I cried because I didn’t have Jilly G’s tits. Then I met a man who did, and I thought, “At least my hands are free to write a Rumination about Jilly G’s tits.”
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I have one religious tenet when it comes to sex: Ask and ye
I have one religious tenet when it comes to sex: Ask and ye shall receive. Except for anal.
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Sometimes I think my man just looks at me as a sex toy. A hot,
Sometimes I think my man just looks at me as a sex toy. A hot, wet, squirmy, stand-upsex-in-the-shower, reverse cowgirl sex toy.
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Some people say the difference between “like” and “love” is
Some people say the difference between “like” and “love” is “spit” and “swallow,” but that sounds more like the difference between “right” and “wrong” to me.
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Evidently, some guys consider less-than-manly the idea of a man
Evidently, some guys consider less-than-manly the idea of a man making lunch for his wife before he leaves for work. At least that would explain the snickering when I told my co-workers that I tossed my wife’s salad this morning.
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Life is like a box of popcorn: You really crave chocolate, but
Life is like a box of popcorn: You really crave chocolate, but instead get something hard and salty rammed down your throat.
