If you meet a girl just a-walkin’ down the street, singing “Doo wah diddy-diddy, dum diddy do,” snapping her fingers and shuffling her feet, she’s probably not exactly right in the head, and you’re better off not making her acquaintance. Unless she’s got big tits. REALLY big tits.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Urinal proverb: A watched penis never pisses
Urinal proverb: A watched penis never pisses.
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Absinthe makes the schlong grow harder
Absinthe makes the schlong grow harder.
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My sperm bank went out of business. My mistake was building it
My sperm bank went out of business. My mistake was building it so close to Jilly G.’s house — by the time the donors got to my office, they were pretty well emptied of fluids.
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I apologize if my uber-hotness has caused problems for any local
I apologize if my uber-hotness has caused problems for any local businesses. I guess the guys just really like my “first served, first cum” motto.
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They say you can conserve water by putting a brick in your
They say you can conserve water by putting a brick in your toilet tank. I must be saving a ton of water because I drop one directly in the bowl every morning.
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When making an erotic cake, is there a recipe for cum icing, or
When making an erotic cake, is there a recipe for cum icing, or does the baker just play around with it until it cums out okay?
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Don’t you hate it when you’re about to cum and the guy does
Don’t you hate it when you’re about to cum and the guy does something to ruin it? You know, like speaking.
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My boyfriend won’t stop staring at me when I brush my teeth. I
My boyfriend won’t stop staring at me when I brush my teeth. I swear I’m never again buying a toothbrush that’s an exact replica of his hard cock.
