Talk about pulled in two different directions: When her lips finally parted and she took my penis in her mouth, I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. But after I forgot to warn her I was about to cum, I thought she’d murder me.
Tone: crude humor
Crude humor humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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To those guys who take a leak at the urinal hands-free, I have
To those guys who take a leak at the urinal hands-free, I have this to say: I *have* to hold mine to keep it from touching the urinal.
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I got even with my ex-wife for dumping me for a guy with a
I got even with my ex-wife for dumping me for a guy with a bigger penis; I dumped HER for a woman with a MASSIVE vagina!
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If you meet a girl just a-walkin’ down the street, singing “Doo
If you meet a girl just a-walkin’ down the street, singing “Doo wah diddy-diddy, dum diddy do,” snapping her fingers and shuffling her feet, she’s probably not exactly right in the head, and you’re better off not making her acquaintance. Unless she’s got big tits. REALLY big tits.
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My sperm bank went out of business. My mistake was building it
My sperm bank went out of business. My mistake was building it so close to Jilly G.’s house — by the time the donors got to my office, they were pretty well emptied of fluids.
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They say you can conserve water by putting a brick in your
They say you can conserve water by putting a brick in your toilet tank. I must be saving a ton of water because I drop one directly in the bowl every morning.
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Which came first: underwear or the skidmark
Which came first: underwear or the skidmark?
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I have one religious tenet when it comes to sex: Ask and ye
I have one religious tenet when it comes to sex: Ask and ye shall receive. Except for anal.
