Tone: crude humor

Crude humor humor, jokes, memes, and punchlines sorted by emotional damage level from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

I think getting Amanda Bynes alone would be the hard part.

I think getting Amanda Bynes alone would be the hard part. Convincing her my cock dispenses thorazine should be a piece of cake.
I fell asleep with the “calming nature rhythms” station on and

I fell asleep with the “calming nature rhythms” station on and woke in a cold sweat when humpback whales were about to fuck on top of me.
I don’t really find back of the neck tattoos attractive on a

I don’t really find back of the neck tattoos attractive on a woman, but I do appreciate having something to read during sex — so thanks, ladies!
“Oh, the Places You’ll Go!” has a very different meaning for

“Oh, the Places You’ll Go!” has a very different meaning for those into scat.
You know it’s time to find a new boyfriend when you tell him

You know it’s time to find a new boyfriend when you tell him you’re feeling sick and he responds with, “So I guess anal’s a ‘no-go’ then?”
I used to feel confident because so many gay dudes were hot for

I used to feel confident because so many gay dudes were hot for me. Then I realized that gay dudes, like me, will stick their dicks in anything.
The song says you can’t hurry love, yet my boyfriend manages to

The song says you can’t hurry love, yet my boyfriend manages to cum in less than 60 seconds every damn time.
I like my women like I like my grilled cheese sandwiches:

I like my women like I like my grilled cheese sandwiches: slightly toasted, cheesy, and with really large tits.
“Hey Mother, want another?” Some dude trying to get rid of a

“Hey Mother, want another?” Some dude trying to get rid of a broken condom.
IDEA! A free sip of strong espresso before you order at the

IDEA! A free sip of strong espresso before you order at the coffee shop. So nobody’s drink goes cold while they’re waiting in line to shit.