Rap version: If I had a hammer, I’d hammer in the morning, I’d hammer in the evening, All over this motherfucker.
Joke Type: crude humor
Crude humor jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
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I suppose the hardest part of being a hermaphrodite would be
I suppose the hardest part of being a hermaphrodite would be remembering not to flush your tampons down the urinal.
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I like chicks unshaven down there. No woman who can’t even
I like chicks unshaven down there. No woman who can’t even support a colony of crab lice is gonna raise MY kids.
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to each was that I thought she was beautiful and that she’d
to each was that I thought she was beautiful and that she’d probably look even better crumpled up in a pile on the floor next to my bed.
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My wife can’t figure out why I love staying up late to do our
My wife can’t figure out why I love staying up late to do our taxes. What she doesn’t know is that my process involves writing “I.R.S.” on the forehead of a blow-up doll and repeatedly ramming it in the ass.
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If you’re ever of a mind to use a little saliva of your T.P. to
If you’re ever of a mind to use a little saliva of your T.P. to blunt the scratch of it across your ass, you might want to stay focused on the whole “lick, wipe, lick, wipe” order of the event chain.
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I’ve found that a good way to get out of a boring staff meeting
I’ve found that a good way to get out of a boring staff meeting well in advance is to warn all parties about the potential of a “brutal mudbutt incident.”
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Hey, if my boyfriend’s penis could spurt chocolate, I’d never
Hey, if my boyfriend’s penis could spurt chocolate, I’d never take the damn thing OUT of my mouth.
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Of all the movie lines I’ve quoted in an effort to pick up a
Of all the movie lines I’ve quoted in an effort to pick up a guy, City Slickers’ “I shit bigger than you” is probably my least successful.
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Titty fucking: fun to say, and even more fun to do
Titty fucking: fun to say, and even more fun to do!
