Bullshit is like fart air. You’ll bask in your own all day long.
Meh Thoughts
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“Oh, that’s good, yeah. You like that, don’t you, you dirty
“Oh, that’s good, yeah. You like that, don’t you, you dirty bitch?” – Bob the Dog Groomer, at least once a fucking day
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Sometimes I think my wife finds excuses to barge into the
Sometimes I think my wife finds excuses to barge into the bathroom in the morning just to see if she can catch me jerking off in the shower. That suspicious little minx!
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Tonight’s forecast: Overnight highs in the mid 70s with mostly
Tonight’s forecast: Overnight highs in the mid 70s with mostly cloudy skies and a 60% chance of me cornholing your sister.
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I cried because I had no shoes. Then I met a wanker who had no dick
I cried because I had no shoes. Then I met a wanker who had no dick.
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You can have my penis when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.
You can have my penis when you pry it from my cold, dead hands. Gun. I meant gun.
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*RING* “Hello?” “What’s up?” “Aw, man, I was right in the middle
*RING* “Hello?” “What’s up?” “Aw, man, I was right in the middle of masturbating.” “Then why’d you answer?” “I thought it might be my mom.”
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Word to the wise: No matter how good the sex was, never
Word to the wise: No matter how good the sex was, never high-five your dick.
