Meh Thoughts

Meh thoughts

Short thoughts for long downward spirals

Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.

  • The Clapper and the Mime

    Does the Clapper still turn the lights on if a mime is doing the clapping?

  • Do You Want Porn with That

    When is McDonald’s going to realize they’d get much bigger sales with, “Do you want porn with that?”

  • Drive-Thru Speaker Fixed

    I told one of my HMO patients to go get a tonsillectomy, and now he’s mad because he thought I said “appendectomy” and got his appendix removed instead. I guess I should really look into getting my drive-thru speaker fixed.

  • How’s It Hangin

    If you ever make the grueling trek to speak to the wise old man who lives at the top of the mountain and he lets you ask one question of him, don’t make the mistake I did and blurt out, “How’s it hangin’?”

  • Be a Pet Fish

    I think it would be great to be a pet fish, except for that part where they taste their floating poop to see if it’s food.

  • Chain It to a Pipe in the Basement

    If you really love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, chain it to a pipe in the basement, because you don’t want to take a chance like that twice.

  • Count Chocula Puts Out a Tasty Cereal

    You know, for an evil, undead minion of Satan who feasts on the blood of the living, that Count Chocula sure puts out a mighty tasty cereal.

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