I got even with my ex-wife for dumping me for a guy with a bigger penis; I dumped HER for a woman with a MASSIVE vagina!
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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I think I’d enjoy anal sex more if I liked things being placed
I think I’d enjoy anal sex more if I liked things being placed in my ass.
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I am no longer called a serial masturbator since I threw out my
I am no longer called a serial masturbator since I threw out my Cap’n Crunch vibrator.
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I wonder why the sperm bank doesn’t have a drive-through teller.
I wonder why the sperm bank doesn’t have a drive-through teller. It seems like the logical next step since so many guys masturbate in their cars.
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I rubbed a magnet on my genitals once. My left nut became
I rubbed a magnet on my genitals once. My left nut became positive, my right nut negative, and my johnson pointed to true north.
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If you meet a girl just a-walkin’ down the street, singing “Doo
If you meet a girl just a-walkin’ down the street, singing “Doo wah diddy-diddy, dum diddy do,” snapping her fingers and shuffling her feet, she’s probably not exactly right in the head, and you’re better off not making her acquaintance. Unless she’s got big tits. REALLY big tits.
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Urinal proverb: A watched penis never pisses
Urinal proverb: A watched penis never pisses.
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Absinthe makes the schlong grow harder
Absinthe makes the schlong grow harder.
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My sperm bank went out of business. My mistake was building it
My sperm bank went out of business. My mistake was building it so close to Jilly G.’s house — by the time the donors got to my office, they were pretty well emptied of fluids.
