I apologize if my uber-hotness has caused problems for any local businesses. I guess the guys just really like my “first served, first cum” motto.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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They say you can conserve water by putting a brick in your
They say you can conserve water by putting a brick in your toilet tank. I must be saving a ton of water because I drop one directly in the bowl every morning.
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When making an erotic cake, is there a recipe for cum icing, or
When making an erotic cake, is there a recipe for cum icing, or does the baker just play around with it until it cums out okay?
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Don’t you hate it when you’re about to cum and the guy does
Don’t you hate it when you’re about to cum and the guy does something to ruin it? You know, like speaking.
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My boyfriend won’t stop staring at me when I brush my teeth. I
My boyfriend won’t stop staring at me when I brush my teeth. I swear I’m never again buying a toothbrush that’s an exact replica of his hard cock.
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There’s a girl in my office who pipes up at the end of every
There’s a girl in my office who pipes up at the end of every sentence and tries to finish it for you. In response, I’ve started ending all my sentences with “that fucks a donkey.” It hasn’t really stopped her from trying to finish my sentences, but it’s gotten me a LOT of attention from the Human Resources folks.
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Which came first: underwear or the skidmark
Which came first: underwear or the skidmark?
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I cried because I didn’t have Jilly G’s tits. Then I met a man
I cried because I didn’t have Jilly G’s tits. Then I met a man who did, and I thought, “At least my hands are free to write a Rumination about Jilly G’s tits.”
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I have one religious tenet when it comes to sex: Ask and ye
I have one religious tenet when it comes to sex: Ask and ye shall receive. Except for anal.
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Sometimes I think my man just looks at me as a sex toy. A hot,
Sometimes I think my man just looks at me as a sex toy. A hot, wet, squirmy, stand-upsex-in-the-shower, reverse cowgirl sex toy.
