My wife just gave birth today and after thanking the doctor, I pulled him aside and sheepishly asked, “How soon do you think we’ll be able to have sex?”
He winked at me and said, “I’m off duty in ten minutes, meet me in the car park.”
Delivery Style: surprise twist
Surprise twist joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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I’m a Doctor in Mathematics – My Friend Is Dying – Minus One
– Do you have a doctor here?
– yes, I’m.
– What’s your specialty?
– I’m a doctor in Mathematics.
– My friend is dying.
– Minus one.
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Chillin’ With My Homies at the Last Supper – This Food You’re Eating Is My Body – YAHWEH
SO I WAS CHILLIN’ WITH MY HOMIES AT THE LAST SUPPER AND I WAS LIKE BROS… THIS FOOD YOUR EATING IS MY BODY.. THEY WERE ALL LIKE NO WAY!
AND I WAS LIKE, YAHWEH
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Do Amish Dudes Have to Row Boat Their Wife’s Titties?
Hes probably thinking about other women
Do Amish dudes have to row boat their wife’s titties?
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Game Show Idea: 11 Gay Men and 1 Straight Man – None of the Men Are Actually Gay
Game Show Idea:
11 gay men and 1 straight man are locked in a house. The object for the gay men is to find out who isn’t gay. Once a week someone gets outvoted, until 2 are left, or the straight man is out. If the gays manage to outvote him, they win 1 million dollars. If the straight man is among the 2 last people in the house in the end, he wins 1 million dollars.
Now here’s the twist: None of the men are actually gay, they just all think they are the one straight man.
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Dog: Drop the Ball – Dog: Go Fuck Yourself
Dog: You are my life. My purpose. I will do anything for you
Human: Drop the ball
Dog: Go fuck yourself
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What Do They Have in Common
What does a burnt pizza, a frozen beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone forgot to take it out.
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Luck Be in the Air Tonight – I Definitely Guessed That Answer Horribly Wrong
annabellehector: luck be in the air tonight
tinylesbianarms: well I definitely guessed that answer horribly wrong.
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What’s Black and Never Works? Decaffeinated Coffee. You Racist Bastard.
WHAT’S BLACK AND NEVER WORKS?
DECAFFEINATED COFFEE
YOU RACIST BASTARD.
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Banging This Hot Chick on Her Kitchen Table – Quick Try the Backdoor
I was banging this hot chick on her kitchen table when we heard the front door open
She said “it’s my husband! Quick, try the backdoor!”
Thinking back, I really should have ran but you don’t get offers like that every day.
