My son wanted to know what it was like to be a parent…
So, I woke him up at 2am to tell him my sock fell off and then again at 4 to tell him I needed to pee.
Format: anecdotal
Anecdotal comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Theyre Having a Yard Sale
One day, while going to the store, I passed by a nursing home. On the front lawn were six old ladies lying naked on the grass. I thought this was a bit unusual, but continued on my way to the store. On my return trip, I passed the same nursing home with the same six old ladies lying naked on the lawn. This time, my curiosity got the best of me and I went inside to talk to the Nursing Home Administrator.
“Do you know there are six ladies lying naked on your front lawn?”
“Yes,” she said. “They’re retired prostitutes — they’re having a yard sale.”
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Does It Hurt as Much as Tennis Elbow
A man got on the train with both front trouser pockets full of golf balls and sat down next to a beautiful blonde.
The puzzled blonde kept staring at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after several curious glances, he said, “It’s golf balls.”
She kept looking, thinking hard, then finally asked, “Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?”
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The Hard Disk
Last night, my friends and I went to a geek strip club called “The Hard Disk.” Lame, you say? What if I told you they only charged $20 for a laptop dance?
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So Is the Red Haired Schoolteacher
The tourist had lost his way on a back road and stopped at the farmhouse to ask if he could be put up for the night.
“Well, we’re a mite crowded, since there’s already someone in the spare room,” replied the farmer. “But I guess you can stay if you don’t mind sharing the bed with a red haired schoolteacher.”
“Look,” said the tourist, “I want you to know I’m a gentleman.”
“Well,” mused the farmer, “as far as I can tell, so is the red haired schoolteacher.”
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Take a Clean Dish
Two confirmed bachelors sat talking. Their conversation drifted from politics to cooking. “I got a cookbook once,” said the first, “but I could never do anything with it.”
“Too much fancy cooking in it, eh?” asked the second.
“You said it. Every one of the recipes began the same way – ‘Take a clean dish and….’”
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4 Better 4 Worse 4 Richer 4 Poorer
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, “How many women can a man marry?”
“Sixteen,” the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he knew the answer so quickly.
“How do you know that?”
“Easy,” the little boy said. “All you have to do is add it up, like the Preacher said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer.”
