Two Irish women were out in the field digging up potatoes.
One of them pulls out a huge one and says, “Ah, it’s just like my husband’s penis.”
The other gasps, “Oh? that big?”
The first shakes her head and says, “No. That dirty.”
Format: narrative
Narrative comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Big Potatoes and Dirty Secrets!
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Commissioned mural
A wealthy man commissioned an artist to paint a mural depicting General Custer’s last words at the Battle of the Little Bighorn. He told the artist he’d have complete creative freedom on how to present the scene.
Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.Unleash Chaos -
Eyes Wide Open: A Unique Surgery Success
Went to school with a guy who was born without eyelids. He underwent surgery where they circumcised him and used the foreskin to create natural looking eyelids. The operation was a success.
He still looks a little cockeyed though.
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An artist needed glasses…
An artist needed glasses, but like many artists, she didn’t have health insurance.
An ophthalmologist who admired her work offered a deal: he’d cover the cost of everything except the office visit if she’d paint a mural in his waiting room.
Two weeks later, the artist had her new glasses and spent the weekend painting the mural. On Monday, the doctor and his staff arrived, eager to see what she’d created.
The artist proudly ushered them in. Every wall was covered with eyes — some open, some closed, some long-lashed, in shades of brown, blue, green, and hazel. One even had a single teardrop.
“So,” asked the artist, “what do you think?”
The doctor paused, looked around the room, and said, “I think I’m glad I’m not a gynecologist.”
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Three men find a harem
Three guys were traveling through Saudi Arabia when they accidentally stumbled into a harem tent filled with over a hundred beautiful women.
They started getting friendly with the women when suddenly the Sheik burst in and shouted, “I am the master of all these women! No one else may touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you’ve done. Your punishment will correspond to your profession.”
He turned to the first man and asked, “What do you do for a living?”
“I’m a cop,” the first man said.
“Then we will shoot your penis off!” declared the Sheik.
Next, he turned to the second man. “And you?”
“I’m a fireman.”
“Then we will burn your penis off!”
Finally, the Sheik turned to the third man. “And what do you do for a living?”
The third man grinned and said, “I’m a lollipop salesman.”
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Princess No More: An Alliance in Love
My last girlfriend demanded to be treated as a princess.
Boy was she mad when I married her off to secure an alliance with France. -
How is your mother-in-law?
I went to get a haircut the other day, and the barber kept asking me the same question over and over. As he’s cutting my hair, he says, “So, how’s your mother-in-law doing?”
I shrugged and said, “She’s fine.”
Five minutes later, he asks again, “So, how’s your mother-in-law?”
Now I’m getting annoyed, but I answer, “I told you, she’s fine.”
A few minutes after that, he asks yet again, “So, how is your mother-in-law doing?”
I finally snap: “Dude, I already told you twice—she’s fine! Why do you keep asking about my mother-in-law?”
He chuckles and says, “Oh, don’t worry, it’s not because I actually care. Every time I mention your mother-in-law, your hair stands straight up… and it makes it a lot easier for me to cut it!”
