Meh Thoughts

Meh thoughts

Short thoughts for long downward spirals

Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.

  • Chinese Amputee

    What do you call a Chinese amputee?

    Tai Wan Shu.

  • Mike Tyson’s Religion

    How can you tell Mike Tyson does not like religion?

    Because he punches everyone on their faith.

  • Can’t Win a Mall

    I entered a lottery to win an entire shopping center, but I failed.

    I guess you can’t win a mall.

  • Mirror Mirror

    I want to have sex with someone who’s as attractive as I am.

    That’s why I always masturbate in front of a mirror.

  • Jesus vs. a Frame of Jesus

    What’s the difference between Jesus and a frame of Jesus?

    You can hang the frame with only one nail.

  • Same Name

    I should be happy because I have a new girlfriend. The problem is she has the same name as my sister. So every time we have sex now…

    …all I think about is my new girlfriend.

  • My frog impression

    I’ll never forget what my granddad said to me before he croaked.
    He said, “Hey kid, wanna hear my frog impression?”

  • Ketchup with old friends again

    I just got back from the annual Condiment Convention.

    It was nice to ketchup with old friends again.

  • The Times are rough

    I’ve run out of toilet paper, so I’ve started using old newspaper…
    The Times are rough.

  • Ancient grease

    An archaeologist found a 2,000-year-old oil stain.
    Ancient grease.

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