A tip for making any Dr. Seuss book tolerable for adults: Try to find as many pictures of genitalia in the illustrations as you can.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Seagulls or Bagels? A Silly Dilemma!
Why won’t seagulls fly over the bay?
Because then they’d be bagels. -
At least she’ll never be hungry
I bet if an eagle’s daughter ever flew off with a buzzard, the eagle would react nobly and think, “Well, at least she’ll never be hungry.”
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Take on an Empty Stomach
Doctor: “Have you been taking the medicine I prescribed you last month?”
Me: “It says to take on an empty stomach, so no, I haven’t had the chance.”
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To me it was never about “Romulans versus Klingons” as much as
To me it was never about “Romulans versus Klingons” as much as it was about “How far am I going to take this in order to bang a chick willing to wear Spock ears during sex?”
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She laughed when she realized it’s “condom” not “condiment,” but
She laughed when she realized it’s “condom” not “condiment,” but she’s not the one with mustard burns on her pecker.
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I don’t know why men are always so interested in tits. On the
I don’t know why men are always so interested in tits. On the other hand, I don’t know why *I’m* so interested in them either. Ah, the mysteries of life.
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A gardener hoes his beets
What’s the difference between a gardener and a pimp?
A gardener hoes his beets.
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I was slipping into my date’s drink, but it turns out they were
I was slipping into my date’s drink, but it turns out they were laxatives.
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CB Lingo 201
I would think the hardest part of truck-driving school is CB Lingo 201. You know, the second year, where everything you say in class has to be in CB.
