I was datin’ this girl from Eaton.
Or maybe it was the other way around and she was from Dayton.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Nature’s Way of Saying
Garage sales: nature’s way of saying, “Here, let me pay you to throw this out for me.”
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Multiple Autobiographies
The cool thing about having multiple personality disorder is that you get to write a shitload of autobiographies!
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Things started to go sideways
Everything was fine until the crabs arrived.
That’s when things started to go sideways.
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I keep asking my personal waxer if he’d ever consider going out
I keep asking my personal waxer if he’d ever consider going out with me, but he just keeps giving me lip service.
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I Learned Next to Nothing
I was so bored that I memorized six pages of the dictionary, and I learned next to nothing.
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I guess it’s my fault; I kept telling my girlfriend I wanted to
I guess it’s my fault; I kept telling my girlfriend I wanted to see her get nasty and sweaty with another woman. But hair-pulling on “Jerry Springer” wasn’t exactly what I had in mind.
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Haven’t Heard From Him Since
Another friend recently quit his job to pursue a career to be a mime.
I haven’t heard from him since.
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The Hyperbole
While the Super Bowl has about seventy thousand attendees each year, the hyperbole has at least a bajillion.
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“There’s a one letter difference between ‘heroes’ and ‘herpes,’
“There’s a one letter difference between ‘heroes’ and ‘herpes,’ so choose wisely, kids.” Why I’m not allowed to speak at schools anymore.
