Camels call their feet “pussy wedgies.”
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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I cried because I didn’t have Jilly G’s tits. Then I met a man
I cried because I didn’t have Jilly G’s tits. Then I met a man who did, and I thought, “At least my hands are free to write a Rumination about Jilly G’s tits.”
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I Have Contacts
I’ve just been pulled over by a police officer. He saw my license and said I’m supposed to be wearing glasses. I said I have contacts.
He said he didn’t care who I knew.
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A Ham-Brrr-Grrr
What do you call a pig that is cold and growling?
A Ham-Brrr-Grrr.
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It Will Be Missed
I donated my old basketball hoop to the school for the blind.
It will be missed.
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The Speed Limit of Sex
What is the speed limit of sex?
68 — because at 69 you have to turn around.
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Ocean Depths: A Lawyer’s Ideal Ending!
What do you call 20 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start.
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She gave me a big hug
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes.
She turned around and gave me a big hug. -
Not Looked Back Since
To save money on fuel I took the mirrors off of my car to reduce drag.
I’ve not looked back since.
