A lawyer’s favorite exercise is stretching one sentence into six billable pages.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Weird how people always say something bad smells like raw
Weird how people always say something bad smells like raw sewage, as if cooked sewage doesn’t smell like shit.
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Elevator Adventures: Uplifted and Let Down!
My first time using an elevator was an uplifting experience.
The second time let me down. -
I was fine trying a reverse cowgirl for my man, but I still
I was fine trying a reverse cowgirl for my man, but I still think it was overkill when he branded my ass.
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Mother-in-Law Showdown: Whose Is Nicer?
My wife accused me of liking my relatives more than hers. I told her that was absolutely not true.
I thought her mother-in-law was much nicer than mine.
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None of the girls at the salon will wax my ass after they saw my
None of the girls at the salon will wax my ass after they saw my vestigial tail because now they think I’m a demon.
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Oral Sex Makes Your Day
Q: What’s the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
A: Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak.
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Boyfriends are like used car salesmen: They lie, they scam, and
Boyfriends are like used car salesmen: They lie, they scam, and they fuck your brains out in the backseat.
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The Deer
I told my daughter that I saw a deer on the way to work this morning. She asked me…
“How do you know it was on its way to work?”
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My Real Life
I would be completely happy to just live in my dreams, if it weren’t for my girlfriend repeatedly changing into Hitler. No, wait a minute — that’s my real life.
