Apparently a red light outside a whorehouse doesn’t mean the same thing as at a traffic light. Blue balls seem universal, though.
Meh Thoughts
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When I looked down to see my penis was swollen large and turning
When I looked down to see my penis was swollen large and turning green, I started to panic. Then I realized I’d mistakenly purchased “Shrek” condoms.
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I’ll bet that when Audrey Hepburn farted, it sounded like a
I’ll bet that when Audrey Hepburn farted, it sounded like a playful piccolo solo.
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I’m so cool I knew William Shatner when he was still William
I’m so cool I knew William Shatner when he was still William Shittingner.
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Zit or baby spider-filled cyst? *POP* Zit. Zit or baby
Zit or baby spider-filled cyst? *POP* Zit. Zit or baby spider-filled cyst? *POP* Zit. Zit or baby spider-filled cyst?
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“This here.” “What is some bullshit?” “Can you be more
“This here.” “What is some bullshit?” “Can you be more specific?” “What is some bullshit, right here?” “Correct!” – Ghetto Jeopardy
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My dog likes to sniff bushes while he poops, lending a lot of
My dog likes to sniff bushes while he poops, lending a lot of weight to my theories that shrubs are just dog magazines.
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“You CAN Go Fuck Yourself!” – AutoerotiCon 2014 Seminar
“You CAN Go Fuck Yourself!” – AutoerotiCon 2014 Seminar
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The new guy I’m dating is going to be so happy about his
The new guy I’m dating is going to be so happy about his birthday present. It was a no-brainer, though, getting him water skis, since he he’s been telling me for weeks he’s into watersports.
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I have a penis and know how to cook. Laydeez! I’m one-stop
I have a penis and know how to cook. Laydeez! I’m one-stop shopping for feeding and fucking!
