Two guys are arguing about whether Taco Bell should be considered Mexican food.
At least they both agree that it is Mexican.
Meh Thoughts
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The Deer
I told my daughter that I saw a deer on the way to work this morning. She asked me…
“How do you know it was on its way to work?”
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Bulldozer
My wife is learning how to operate a bulldozer.
I’m not going to stand in her way.
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What Do They Have in Common
What does a burnt pizza, a frozen beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone forgot to take it out.
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Helen Keller’s Swing Set
Did you know that Helen Keller had a swing set?
You didn’t know? Neither did she.
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Make Up Sex
They say make-up sex is the best, which is lucky, because all my sex is made up.
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Cock Fighting
I just found out that cockfighting is done with chickens. That’s two years of training I’ll never get back.
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Go Big or Go to Hell
If it’s 1 or 1,000 sins, you’re still getting sent to Hell. So why not go for 1,000,000 sins and come down here a legend.
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The Only One
I asked my wife if I was the only one she’d been with.
She said yes — all the others had been nines and tens.
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The Classic Move
Me: *trying the ol’ yawn/reach-around-the-shoulder trick*
Other guy at urinal: Hey.
