My girlfriend’s favorite sexual thing is reverse cowgirl. First she farts repeatedly, then she eats beans from a can by the campfire.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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(Tim H. Richweis) The biggest difference between my clitoris and
(Tim H. Richweis) The biggest difference between my clitoris and Osama bin Laden is that a guy actually found Osama bin Laden.
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I still don’t understand what went wrong. I thought it was a
I still don’t understand what went wrong. I thought it was a pretty foolproof idea to take my animal-loving, PETA-member girlfriend down to Tijuana for a real, live donkey show.
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I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, I’m just saying I
I’m not saying my boyfriend’s penis is small, I’m just saying I should probably be able to tell the difference between fucking and acupuncture.
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If zombies survived by eating genitalia instead of brains, I’ll
If zombies survived by eating genitalia instead of brains, I’ll bet there would be more than a few living guys who, when faced with an imminent attack, would consider it, then say, “What the hell…”
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Silly me. I assumed my girlfriend’s nickname of “Thunder Thighs”
Silly me. I assumed my girlfriend’s nickname of “Thunder Thighs” had something to do with their size — until I heard the rumbling noises that often emanate from near the tops of them.
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I like to do it doggy-style. That’s where I growl at my husband,
I like to do it doggy-style. That’s where I growl at my husband, then lift my leg and pee on him.
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My girlfriend gives the best blowjobs EVER. It’s not the
My girlfriend gives the best blowjobs EVER. It’s not the penis-in-the-mouth part that so great, though — it’s the part where she doesn’t get mad at me for pretending that I’m Captain Kirk and she’s Mr. Spock.
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My girlfriend is all pissed off because I ruined her Mickey
My girlfriend is all pissed off because I ruined her Mickey Mouse bobblehead. I maintain that with all that alcohol in my system, it looked exactly like a butt plug.
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The thing I find so disgusting about airport bathrooms is you
The thing I find so disgusting about airport bathrooms is you have no idea how many people have smeared a sheen of their semen on the toilet seat before you did.
