Delivery Style: observational

Observational joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

  • The Top 14 October Surprises

    14. A final, no-holds-barred presidential debate is hastily scheduled by the producers of “American Gladiators.”

    Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
    Unleash Chaos

    13. Supreme Court opens their new session by replacing “yea” or “nay” with “left” or “right.”

    12. Donald Trump provides incontrovertible proof that he’s not a Russian spy by revealing that he’s a Chinese spy.

    11. Bill already advertising for interns on Craigslist.

    10. The pumpkin spice craze is a secret chemical warfare plot concocted by Donald Trump to turn the entire world orange.

    9. Ronald Reagan rises from the dead, just to show that he can.

    8. Hillary’s server full of e-mails advocating “grabbing Bernie by the droopy balls.”

    7. Oddly enough, Disney’s Hall of Presidents attraction has had a Hillary figure ready to go since 1996.

    6. Hearing a 9-year-old tell a 7-year-old his costume is culturally insensitive.

    5. The press rebrands the Affordable Care Act as the Holy-Cow-Talk-About-Sticker-Shock Care Act.

    4. Scientists discover that Trump’s hair is a living creature that controls the empty puppet underneath.

    3. Anthony Weiner: the dick that keeps on giving.

    2. E-mail discovered on Anthony Weiner’s computer reveals that his birth name was Anthony Vajayjay.

    1. Not a soul has come from the future to put a stop to this madness.

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  • Turning Point USA Irony

    Turning Point USA Irony

    Turning Point USA was founded in 2012 by Charlie Kirk and Bill Montgomery.

    Two of their major policy pushes were a more prominent gun culture and zero COVID restrictions.

    Bill Montgomery died to the COVID virus.

    Charlie Kirk died to gun violence.

  • A Stolen Car

    Two police officers stood beside a man who was bitterly crying.

    “Wow,” said one police officer, “he must have really loved that car.”

    “Not really,” said the other police officer. “It was five years old but fully insured. He’s crying because he just filled his gas tank.”

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  • You Must Be Single

    Today I bought two bananas, an apple, and a pack of cigarettes. The cashier looked at me and said, “You must be single, huh?” And I’m like, “How do you know that?”

    She said, “Because you’re ugly.”

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  • Too Much Sex Memory Loss

    Too Much Sex Memory Loss

    “Having too much sex can cause memory loss.” I read it on page 37 in a medical journal in November 2006 at 4:19pm.

  • Cookie Monster Wasting Cookies

    Cookie Monster Wasting Cookies

    rob elliott @rockymomax

    The amount of cookies I’ve watched the Cookie Monster waste with his bullshit chewing makes me sick

  • Love Shaq

    Love Shaq

    “I can’t end my messages with ‘Love, Shaq’, because the B-52s ruined that for me”

    ~ Shaquille O’Neal

  • Cookie Monster Waste

    The amount of cookies I’ve watched the Cookie Monster waste with his bullshit chewing makes me sick.

  • The Hyperbole

    While the Super Bowl has about seventy thousand attendees each year, the hyperbole has at least a bajillion.