Most zoo dentists refuse to treat a grizzly without strong anesthesia first.
Because there’s safety in numb bears.
Delivery Style: setup-punchline
Setup-punchline joke delivery styles, punchline pacing, and comedy formats for people with specific chaos preferences from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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The Tolkien White Guys
The only two white actors in Black Panther are Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins, and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.
They’re the Tolkien white guys.
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Never Really That Into Her
So sad news, my girlfriend broke up with me for having a small penis.
It’s OK… I was never really that into her.
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Thinking Outside The Box Gary
(At my boss’s funeral kneeling and whispering at coffin)
“Who’s thinking outside the box now Gary?”
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Roland the Farter
Imagine farting so good that the King gives you a 30 acre estate.
Imagine someone farting so good, that you’re reading about them right now, 900 years later.
Roland the Farter – a medieval flatulist who lived in twelfth-century England. Given Hemingstone manor in Suffolk and 12 hectares (30 acres) of land in return for his services as a jester for King Henry II. Each year he was obliged to perform “Unum saltum et siffletum et unum bumbulum” (one jump, one whistle, and one fart) for the King’s court at Christmas.
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Hungover Me Vodka
I WOKE UP THIS MORNING WITH A GLASS OF WATER ON MY BEDSIDE TABLE WITH A NOTE SAYING “FOR HUNGOVER ME”
I DRANK IT AND IT WAS VODKA. DRUNK ME CAN BE SUCH AN ASSHOLE.
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Stop Drop Shut Em Down
So remember stop drop
Shut ’em down open up shop
Firefighter: Woah. No…
Kids: That’s how rough riders roll
Firefighter: *defeated sigh*
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They Prefer to Eat Out
Why don’t lesbians ever get their pizza delivered? They prefer to eat out.
