Format: text
Text comedy formats, jokes, memes, and punchlines organized for easier doom-scrolling from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.
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Visiting the Zoo
A family is visiting the zoo.
While they’re watching the elephants, the little boy points and asks his mother, “Mom, what’s that hanging down underneath the elephant?”
“That’s his trunk,” she replies.
“No,” says the boy, “at the other end.”
“Oh, that’s his tail,” she says.
“No, no, the thing underneath!” the boy insists.
Realizing what he means, the mother blushes and says, “Oh, never mind that. That’s nothing.”
Confused, the boy turns to his father.
“Dad, what is that thing underneath the elephant? Mom said it’s nothing.”
The father looks at the elephant, then at his son, and says, “Well, son, your mother is just spoiled.”
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A man dies in his sleep
A man comes home extremely drunk, goes straight to bed, and falls asleep.
That night, he dies in his sleep.
In the afterlife, an angel greets him and explains what happened. The man is devastated. He tells the angel he still has so much to do in life, regrets drinking so much, and swears that if he’s sent back, he’ll never drink again and will live a healthy life.
The angel says it’s impossible.
After a lot of begging, though, the angel says there is one option: he can return to Earth as a chicken.
The man thinks, “Well, that’s still better than being dead,” and agrees.
He wakes up on a large farm, surrounded by dozens of chickens. He walks around a bit, eats some feed, and even nods at a few other chickens.
Suddenly, he feels an intense pressure in his stomach.
He asks the chicken next to him what’s happening.
The chicken says, “Relax. It’s just an egg. Push as hard as you can and lay it.”
So he starts pushing with all his strength. He feels something moving inside him, slowly making its way out…
Just as it’s about to come out, his wife wakes him up and yells:
“Wake up, you idiot! You’re shitting the bed!”
