Sometimes I think my man just looks at me as a sex toy. A hot, wet, squirmy, stand-upsex-in-the-shower, reverse cowgirl sex toy.
Joke Type: sexual innuendo
Sexual innuendo jokes, punchlines, setups, and comedy bits from Chaotic Meh — sorted for people who know exactly what kind of bad idea they want.
-
Some people say the difference between “like” and “love” is
Some people say the difference between “like” and “love” is “spit” and “swallow,” but that sounds more like the difference between “right” and “wrong” to me.
-
Life is like a box of popcorn: You really crave chocolate, but
Life is like a box of popcorn: You really crave chocolate, but instead get something hard and salty rammed down your throat.
-
Has your grocery list ever seemed Freudian or inappropriate?
Has your grocery list ever seemed Freudian or inappropriate? Mine reads: “relish sausage spread buns.”
-
It was difficult enough working up the nerve to address the
It was difficult enough working up the nerve to address the sexual problems in my marriage and suggest to my wife that maybe we should have an open relationship and have sex with other people. Her response of “THANK YOU, GOD!!!!” sure didn’t help.
-
(Steve R. Clancy) There once was a chick from Vancouver, Who
(Steve R. Clancy) There once was a chick from Vancouver, Who sucked cock like she was a Hoover. Till the day she got ticked And bit off a dick, Then swallowed it like an hors d’oeuvre.
-
There’s nothing sexier than a really smart guy. Unless we’re
There’s nothing sexier than a really smart guy. Unless we’re talking about sex, then a huge dick is really hot, too.
-
(Jilly G.) Who would have guessed that a product called “Kwik
(Jilly G.) Who would have guessed that a product called “Kwik Wood” has nothing to do with erectile dysfunction? Live and learn.
-
I should never have told that chick on Craigslist that I was
I should never have told that chick on Craigslist that I was into humiliation. Right after she had HER orgasm, she took me to a bus stop and gave me $2 for fare.
