Sensitivity: Uncensored

Uncensored humor, jokes, memes, and questionable punchlines from Chaotic Meh — organized so the algorithm can pretend this place has adult supervision.

You know what’s a stupid color? Orange. It’s like red and yellow

You know what’s a stupid color? Orange. It’s like red and yellow had a deformed little abortion. Fuck you, orange.
Don’t believe that lying sack of shit, George Foreman! My

Don’t believe that lying sack of shit, George Foreman! My brilliant invention got rejected without a second thought. Now the world will never know the wonder that is Bukkake Goggles™.
(B0nrMunky) There should be a horse at the Kentucky Derby named,

(B0nrMunky) There should be a horse at the Kentucky Derby named, “Your Wife Looks Like A Stuck Up Cunt In That Hat.”
So, are we just going to pretend that Disney’s “BFG” movie isn’t

So, are we just going to pretend that Disney’s “BFG” movie isn’t trying to subliminally sneak the word “fuck” into a kids’ movie title?
I refuse to look up why Pokemon is trending. Unless some really

I refuse to look up why Pokemon is trending. Unless some really fucked up porn was released, I’m not interested.
If a guy’s coffee order has more than 5 words in it, he should

If a guy’s coffee order has more than 5 words in it, he should have to tuck his penis and balls behind his butt for the rest of the day.
Point of clarification: I wasn’t saying to literally grab women

Point of clarification: I wasn’t saying to literally grab women by the vagina, I just meant grab them by the crotch area. Lying media = unfair!
My wife did a bong hit right before performing analingus on me.

My wife did a bong hit right before performing analingus on me. She says she enjoyed the experience, but I think she was just blowing smoke up my ass.
Lick the Wrinkles Out

WHEN WORD GETS OUT YOU CAN LICK THE WRINKLES OUT A BUTTHOLE.
Tom Jones and the Siamese Twins

A pair of drop-dead gorgeous female Siamese twins who were joined at the hip saw the ad for the concert in the local paper. One of them said, “Hey, Tom Jones is in town! How would you like to go and see him?” They agreed to go, hoping they might get to meet him.
Clean Mode hides the spicy parts.
Unleash Chaos

Tom Jones did in fact notice them from the stage and asked for them to be sent to his room. After a couple of drinks, he asked them if they would be into any hanky-panky, and one of them definitely was, but the other one not so much. Tom asked the other one what she likes doing, and she said she actually likes to play the trombone, so he picked one up from the horn section so she could keep herself amused while he had his way with the other one.

A couple of years later, there was another ad in the paper that the twins saw, and one of them said, “Hey, would you like to go see Tom Jones again?”

The other twin replied, “Do you think he would remember us?”

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