In other news, there’s a new dating app that caters to arsonists.
Every week you get new matches!
Meh Thoughts
-
You Carry the One
How do you get 100 math teachers into a room in which only 99 fit?
You carry the one.
-
Left Another Accordion
I left my car unattended with my accordion on view in the front passenger seat. When I got back, someone had broken into my car
and left another accordion.
-
Bread in Captivity
I went to the zoo last week. The first exhibit was a ciabatta, the second a baguette, and the third a brioche.
They were all bread in captivity.
-
Rearrange the Letters of POSTMEN
If you rearrange the letters of POSTMEN…
They become VERY ANGRY.
-
It Was a French Toast
I was the best man at my brother’s wedding in Paris. At the reception, I raised my champagne glass and said, “Eggs, cinnamon, bread, and maple syrup…”
It was a French toast.
-
What to Do With All the Extra Tacos
My kids refused to eat leftover tacos for dinner, so my wife told me to just throw them out.
Now I don’t know what to do with all the extra tacos.
-
The Penfish Is Even Mightier
The swordfish has no natural predators to fear from…
…except the penfish, which is supposed to be even mightier.
-
Take on an Empty Stomach
Doctor: “Have you been taking the medicine I prescribed you last month?”
Me: “It says to take on an empty stomach, so no, I haven’t had the chance.”
