Regarding being accused of masturbating in the shower: I can tell you that the fact my wife’s conditioner looks like semen has bailed me out on more than one occasion.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Of all the movie lines I’ve quoted in an effort to pick up a
Of all the movie lines I’ve quoted in an effort to pick up a guy, City Slickers’ “I shit bigger than you” is probably my least successful.
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Mirror Mirror
I want to have sex with someone who’s as attractive as I am.
That’s why I always masturbate in front of a mirror.
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I believe God puts people in our lives for a reason. For
I believe God puts people in our lives for a reason. For example, I believe He brought me the new receptionist so I can stare at her tits all day.
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They just closed another massage parlor in my neighborhood. I
They just closed another massage parlor in my neighborhood. I guess people just aren’t coming like they used to.
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Not Looked Back Since
To save money on fuel I took the mirrors off of my car to reduce drag.
I’ve not looked back since.
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Stolen Antidepressants: Find Joy in My Pain
To whoever stole my antidepressants, I hope you’re happy.
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A Ford Oar two-door
Ford should make a coupe and call it the Oar.
It’d be a Ford Oar two-door.
