My dog is really smart.
I asked him, “What’s two minus two?”
He said nothing.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Sometimes you just want a guy to throw you to the ground and
Sometimes you just want a guy to throw you to the ground and fuck the living shit out of you. Other times you just want him to bring you your entrée while it’s still hot.
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Professor Who Changed My Whole Life
In college, I took a class from a professor who changed my whole life. I can’t really remember what his name was, or what the class was, or even which college it was, but I found that if you sit behind a really tall guy and kind of slouch down in your chair you can drink Scotch right from the bottle and not get caught.
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“At least you’re a lesser risk for breast cancer!” I quipped to
“At least you’re a lesser risk for breast cancer!” I quipped to the glaring, flatchested feminists seconds before I realized I’d soon be at no risk for testicular cancer.
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“Gary? Why are you installing side-by-side claw-foot bathtubs in
“Gary? Why are you installing side-by-side claw-foot bathtubs in the yard?” “Read the fine print on the Cialis box, Karen.”
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A lot of things changed
When my girlfriend got pregnant, a lot of things changed.
Like my name, my phone number, and my address. -
I’ve found that a good way to get out of a boring staff meeting
I’ve found that a good way to get out of a boring staff meeting well in advance is to warn all parties about the potential of a “brutal mudbutt incident.”
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One Word or Spread Apart
Is buttcheeks one word or should I spread them apart?
