Women sure are hard to figure out. My new girlfriend makes a big point of telling me she likes really rough sex, then she gets all pissed off about my sandpaper condom invention.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Watching a live stream
Why did the woman bring a remote control to the lake?
She was watching a live stream.
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How do you know it was on its way to work?
I told my daughter that I saw a deer on the way to work this morning. She asked me, “How do you know it was on its way to work?”
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The Holy Trinity
Probably the easiest way to explain the mystery of the Holy Trinity is that One pokes the Other in the eye and the Third goes “Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk!” a lot. Of course, that might just be the NyQuil talking.
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She loves me… She loves me not… She loves me… She loves me
She loves me… She loves me not… She loves me… She loves me not… Hell, as long as she keeps putting out and doesn’t divorce me, what fucking difference does it make?!
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They Were Wright
About a hundred years ago a couple brothers said they could fly.
They were Wright.
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I’m not saying my girlfriend’s vibrator isn’t loud; I’m just
I’m not saying my girlfriend’s vibrator isn’t loud; I’m just saying her neighbor should know that helicopters can’t land on the roof because there’s no room up there.
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Evidently, some guys consider less-than-manly the idea of a man
Evidently, some guys consider less-than-manly the idea of a man making lunch for his wife before he leaves for work. At least that would explain the snickering when I told my co-workers that I tossed my wife’s salad this morning.
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The Only One
I asked my wife if I was the only one she’d been with.
She said yes — all the others had been nines and tens.
