Meh Thoughts

  • Taco Bell’s Colon Cleanse

    I wonder if the people paying $300 for a colon cleanse know about Taco Bell’s $4.99 deal.

  • Eats That Many Trains

    My personal trainer said he eats five big meals and trains six days a week.

    I have no idea how he eats that many trains.

  • Sting Operation

    Did you hear about the bee who got busted for visiting a prostitute?

    It was a sting operation.

  • Taking It Harder

    My family recently discovered our granddad has a Viagra addiction.

    No one is taking it harder than grandma.

  • You’re Next

    Old people at weddings always poke me and say, “You’re next.”

    So I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

  • Toss the Ball

    In some sports you toss the ball to the fans after a victory….

    You’re not supposed to do that when bowling. I know that now.

  • Yes, We Arson

    Kid: Dad, are we pyromaniacs?

    Dad: Yes, we arson.

  • Shout Out to Librarians

    I’d like to give a shout out to all of the librarians…

    …oh… oh, yeah… I’m sorry.

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