handjobs to everyone in the neighborhood.
Meh Thoughts
Meh thoughts
Short thoughts for long downward spirals
Browse quick-hit shower thoughts, deadpan one-liners, dark little observations, and questionable micro-rants from Chaotic Meh. They are short, searchable, and emotionally about as stable as a folding chair in a hurricane.
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Where Did the Creator of The Jetsons Go
Whenever I’m stuck in traffic, I can’t help but wonder, “Where did the creator of ‘The Jetsons’ go, and why hasn’t he done something about this?”
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Grief Lessons: Good Counsel, No Tears
My grief councillor died last week.
Luckily for me, though, he was very good at his job, because I really don’t give a shit.
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Vajayjay. Hoo-ha. Honey pot. Love canal. Man, at the rate they
Vajayjay. Hoo-ha. Honey pot. Love canal. Man, at the rate they keep coming up with new names for lady-parts, I’ll never graduate from medical school.
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Seagulls or Bagels? A Silly Dilemma!
Why won’t seagulls fly over the bay?
Because then they’d be bagels. -
It’s all fun and games until someone tries to text “autocorrect”
It’s all fun and games until someone tries to text “autocorrect” but the autocorrect feature changes the word to “autofellate.” Then it’s just fucking hysterical.
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Firing My Slingshot at Target
The mall security dude arrested me for firing my slingshot at Target. Come on, they were asking for it!
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Great Man Terrible Lifeguard
My dad used to tell me that you can’t save anyone; they have to save themselves.
Great man. Terrible lifeguard.
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I can’t do anything about it
The company I work for is knowingly making defective whistles.
I can’t do anything about it.
